I love you and I promise to look after you !

Hi and thanks for reading, I saw this statement the other day and I felt this was a really good opportunity to write and share some thoughts.

I guess this is something people say quite often, I am sure it’s said when people get in to a serious relationship with a partner.  This is also a statement you quite often hear parents say to their children and even something you would say to close friends.  All of those example are perfectly natural and a great example of being a kind and caring human being who is compelled to look after their loved ones, fantastic.

I also have another take on this, something much more important that we are less likely to do and certainly something I would never have done up until a few years ago.  How about you stand in front of the mirror and say these words.

Now I am sure you have already guessed the purpose of this blog wasn’t to get you to stand in front of the mirror talking to yourself.  However let’s think about what this really means as human beings we are often compelled to feel the need to look after others and care for them, we can find ourselves worrying about our family and friends, their unhealthy lifestyle, their poor choices or their fragile mental state.  At times we can worry about these things so much that we can make our selves sick but in the process how many times do we ever stop to think about ourselves and look at our own lives in detail and asses the choices that we are making, while we are being swept along in the normal throws of life.

How often do you find yourself sitting in a chair drinking wine, smoking a cigarette while eating a take away thinking I’m really worried about my daughter she just doesn’t seem very well at the moment I help she has enough money to be healthy.  Then we worry about our best friend who has the arse hole of a husband and she could do so much better, while we sit at home angry with our current partner just wishing they would piss off out with their friends.

Basically to love and want to take care of others is fantastic but does it really help, does it really amount to anything when we cannot love and take care of ourselves are we just forcing others to worry about us or are we simply just preaching the lessons to others that we are not prepared to act upon ourselves.  In my opinion to truly love and take care of others means you must truly love and take care of yourselve first.  Try it you won’t be disappointed. 

If there is any particular topics you would like me to cover please feel free to comment below, if you have enjoyed what you have read please like and share.  You can also follow on me on instagram @paulw2350 and also find me on Facebook elevatedthinkingsite. I am also on twitter @elevatedthink
Have a great day and stay elevated 
Image courtesy of Gala Darling 


Your life, your choice !

Thanks for reading, I have just come across a great quote today and I just wanted to expand on the quote and give my interpretation on how I understand it.  The great thing about quotes is they are powerful statements usually made by influential and memorable people but actually they could be read by 100 different people and it would mean something slightly different to all of us.

The quote I saw today was by Jeff Bezos

“Everything you are comes from your choices”

This is something I believe in very strongly and if you want to make big changes in your life, it’s something you need to be really aware and conscious of at all times.

Every decision we make, every act we carry out and everything we achieve comes through a serious of choices we have made be it positive or negative.  We have the ability to shape our lives and decide whether or not to be successful based on our choices.

You have a choice on how you take care of your body and how you eat and whether or not your exercise.  You are able to choose whether or not you want to stay in that job that makes you miserable doing just enough not to get sacked or whether you go to work everyday doing something you love and enjoy in which you could go on and be successful.

I am not suggesting that all choices are easy and the quality of your life will change over night but you have to make that choice to start somewhere.  You may be 10-15 years away from your end goal and where you want to be but you can choose to make today that first step in achieving greatness.  All you have to do is to make the conscious effort to be the best you can be at every given moment and try and get a little better each day.

If things are not working for you right now and you are not in the place you want to be, I am sure if you look back over the last few weeks, months or years you will come across a series of choices that you made however big or small that helped contribute to your current situation. 

Sometimes it is easier to bury our heads in the sand and look to blame others and convince ourselves that everything is out of our control but if you really look hard and are open and honest with yourself there will be a whole series’s of choices you have made where you could have made better ones, however that is ok in fact that is awesome the very fact that you are able to see it and understand is the first step in knowing how to fix it and put it right.  All of sudden there you are making the choices to turn things around.

If there is any particular topics you would like me to cover please feel free to comment below, if you have enjoyed what you have read please like and share.  You can also follow on me on instagram @paulw2350 and also find me on Facebook elevatedthinkingsite. I am also on twitter @elevatedthink

Have a great day and stay elevated 

Image coutsey of dreamstime.com

They are a natural ! 

Thanks for reading, I just wanted to give my thoughts on something you tend to hear in life.  I must say this particular statement tends to pop up when people or defending their own poor performance or trying to convince themself they can’t succeed.   It’s usually something on the lines of “It’s easy for them they are natural”

To me there is no such thing as a natural, you have to work hard to be good at something and even harder to be great.  I understand that when we first do something some people will be better at it than others and it seems to come a little bit more naturally but that does not mean we are not all capable of doing it.  What really makes the difference is the motivation and the will to become successful, it’s about finding that connection with something, genuinely doing something you love and enjoy and applying time and repetition.

The most elite sports people in the world where not born at the level there are at today but they have such a love and a passion for what they do that enables them to put in the extra effort to make all the sacrifices that other people are not prepared to do in order to be the best.  

So if you do not have that passion that love and that hunger then it’s easy to look at others and say I can’t be as good as them they are a natural.  No, you just do not have the same drive, ambition and passion to dedicate the time and repetition that it has taken for them to get to that level.

If you truly want to be great at something then you have to find something that you love and enjoy, something that you do not mind making the necessary sacrifices for, something where you are prepared to do more than others around you in order to be successful.  This is not about being a natural but about working hard to become great, it’s never easy at the top.

Just keep pushing and stay elevated 

Image courtesy of Icspartan

Creating a work vs home life balance

I am writing this post in response to a comment I received from a viewer on one of my other posts.  The reader was doing a great job taking action and moving forward in their professional life but felt this success was having an impact on their personal life and was feeling guilty about that, this is a very common trap that many fall in to.  I am aiming this particular post from a coaching and learning perspective mainly at men but that doesn’t mean to say a lady could not take something away from it, however the difference is women tend to think more emotionally and men more practically so it does tend to be an area that men struggle with more.

Firstly when creating a work life balance the worst thing you can do is measure the success or failure against time, most people work 8-9 hours a day, if you sleep for 8 hours you are down to 7-8 hours left add in some chores, children, the commute etc and hey ho we have a winner and it won’t be home. So measure in time and you will fail everytime.

It is great for someone to have a drive and an ambition and actually this should be commended and it is not a negative however what it is very easy to do especially for a man is get so busy with this ambition and this drive that they spend hours in the office and they are that focused on it, that even when they are at home they are not really there but in their mind still in the office, they then justify this by thinking and saying to their partners and children because it is truly what they believe and mean ” I know I’m not home much and I am busy but I do it for you and the kids, I do it so we can have the great lifestyle we have because you mean the world to me” what they are  not paying attention to is their wife saying we never spend any time together, you don’t appreciate what I do at home with the house and the kids I work just as hard, sound familiar anyone!

Creating a work home life balance is about having a strong drive and ambition in the work place but when you come home it’s about creating an environment where your wife or partner can be in their emotional centre, you have LEFT work for the day so you should have LEFT your work there. If you have to moan and gripe about work that’s what your buddies and your boys nights are for.  The first thing any man should do when he comes home is walk up and kiss the lady in his life and say “hey baby, how was your day? What did you get up to?” Then stop and listen and I mean really listen you are home now it’s all about her.  When you are casually sitting watching the TV and your partner speaks, you stop watching and you listen and you really listen.  It’s not about grand gestures and flowers every day, although you must continually date your lover but that’s a topic for another day, it’s about when you are at home she is the centre of your world.

Why when you have been married for 10 years does your wife still get her hair, nails and make up done because she wants you to notice her she wants to be the centre of your world.  The worst thing you can do when your wife says I got my hair or nails done today or I bought this new dress is not pay attention, again you stop what you are doing you look make eye contact and listen and engage.  When she cooks you dinner say thank you tell her lovely it was.  Every few days pick a random moment of the day send her text or give her a call and tell her ” I just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you, I love you”

Just these few simple changes would make such a great impact on being able to continue with a professional drive and ambition yet make everything happy and engaging at home, don’t believe me start now. Stay elevated.